“Your mom is fearless.”
I look up at my husband, puzzled. He was in a conversation with the boys that I didn’t quite follow and some how it ended up with this oneliner. He must be kidding.
Because if there’s anything that I’m not, it’s being fearless. I guess it’s a common mom thing, on top of my own anxiety. And being a mom of boys doesn’t make it easier either. I mean, I don’t want them to be raised as timid mama’s boys, do I?
So I went in the roller coaster because roller coasters are ‘great fun!’.
And I released a big ass spider safe and sound back into our garden because ‘spiders are very useful animals’.
And of course I walked into a pitch dark beaver watch station at the zoo, because ‘there’s nothing to be afraid of the dark.’
Just as any mom, I want the best for my kids. I hope they end up confident, considerate and steadfast. I hope my boys grow up knowing what they love to achieve in life and having the confidence and the will power to go and make it so. I pray they take notion of the people and the world around them and care for more than just themselves.
I wish that they could do all that without getting hurt. I fear for those moments when their hearts will be crushed. Their confidence will be trampled on. When their pride will be smashed to pieces when losing a game. I know that is part of the process. That it is some they have to go through in order to come out stronger.
It does make me wonder though. Does my wish for them not getting hurt make me a tiger mom? It’s a catch-22: because now I’m afraid I’m being an overly protective parent that keeps her children from valuable and necessary life lessons. Because I’m fearful, I’m acting like a tiger mom, and acting like a tiger mom makes me fearful.
Fearless? Ha! Not by a long shot.
Day 16 of writing 101 prompt: We all have anxieties, worries, and fears. What are you scared of? Address one of your worst fears. Today’s Twist: Write this post in a style distinct from your own. For this day, I took the prompt only. Thinking about the twist felt too uncomfortable and frankly, just too difficult. I may try this in my native language.